The Ambush.

(Tough and Sad Reality Mode)
- Adam...
- Tell me, A. C.
- I've told him about his girlfriend again. He doesn't want to believe me.
- Don't tell him anymore. He will regret it. I know it.
- I don't want him to get his heart broken!
- Let it go. He's blinded by her.
- She's a fucking undercover lesbian cheater! Why doesn't he see it?
- Don't pay attention. He will know it by himself one day!
- But...
- Girl, i understand you. But he will have to face it like a man if he finds it out. You know, i also told him, but he will not believe anybody!
- Uhhh. Fuck him. I hope that girl doesn't get caught then. If so, it will be the end.

The daily discussion about Jackie Winter's girlfriend, Tabitha, was getting worse and worse every day. It was a really awkward situation for me, and that was like a black hole in my conscience. But things changed on yesterday's afternoon.

This is the story: Jackie Winter got a girlfriend. Her name is Tabitha. She is a very beautiful girl, and she seems flawless and innocent, but she has a big stain on her moral white dress: one day, on one of my heavy drinking PS2 parties, she told me she was into girls (she also meant: No guys at all!). To make the situation more interesting, i saw her making out with Lacey Riot, one of my girls at Warped Tour's backstage last month, while we were performing. I was in shock, but i knew that it was going to happen.

Next day, i tried to tell Jackie what i saw, but it was impossible. I left him notes on his bed, i talked about it when he was drunk, when he was in the bathroom, while we were playing Guitar Hero, i tried to make him open his eyes everytime i could, but he was always in disbelief. He limited himself to tell me: "The day you have an evidence of that, talk to me. Not before". That was unfair. That girl was going to make me look like the bitch of the show, and the roles were clearly inverted, to my shame.

Tired of jeopardizing my friendship with Jackie Winter, i decided to end this horrible situation once and for all. Lacey Riot was in town, so i invited her to the backstage again, and it made things easier for me. For the concert of yesterday, i made my boys Shooter Kenshiro and Jackie Winter switch positions. That made Jackie move more through the stage, and he inevitably saw what happened in backstage!

To resume the operation, Jackie Winter saw Tabitha molesting Lacey Riot, he saw them making out and he finally believed what i said. That made him send the "lady" to hell, made him learn a really hard lesson, made him say "I'm sorry", made him believe in me and made me say the worst sentence in the world when someone is in trouble: "I fucking told you so!".

Gunshots for the Undead.

(Videogame Insanity Mode)
After reloading my head with a little sniff, i opened my eyes and found myself in a sewer, with a 9mm handgun, a Benelli M39, some fine ammo and a bloodstained outfit. Cold air, it was freezing my lungs and my legs, despite of the corduroy coat and the leather boots i was wearing. I wish i had some weed, or a normal cigarrette, but a can of Heineken worked perfectly as a placebo.

After killing a horde of hungry zombies, i was tired, and i was in need for an exit of that section of Helheim. Alone and better like that, i decided to walk forever and ever, but something made me change my mind.

I heard a weird noise, a crash and a heavy breathing. I walked through the sewer for a while and i turned on a flashlight. Sitting down in one of the corners, visibly wounded, with a face down corpse at his feet and reloading his TMP, Steve tried to escape from the wrong side of the way. It's not good to have a tail while you are running away, but i decided to help that hottie anyway. He would be useful in the future.

- How are you doing, Burnside?
- (Gasping) Better than i thought. That fucking zombie bit me.
- Do you know what happens after that, right?
- Yes. I do. That's why i'm going to ask you a favor.
- I'm not going to shoot you. It's your lucky day!

Quickly, i took out one of the syringes i found before in one of the labs and injected Steve. After that, i wanted to see the zombie's face, and i flipped the corpse up.

Poof. I couldn't see the corpse's face. A drunk Jackie Winter tried to sleep using me as a mattress and fell over me, breaking my channelled concentration and waking me up from that induced mental videogame.

- Sorry, A. C. Did i hurt you?
- Nope. No worries!
- Do you want to play anything?
- Oh. Sure.

At the end of the day, i wasn't able to end my G-Virus infected adventure, but i played Resident Evil Code Veronica to cool down my anger. And i got my payback for the frustrated dream, crushing Jackie Winter in Budokai Tenkaichi 3. Thank you, Lord. I got my payback, and i will sleep better tonight!

Jackie for Mommy, Winter for Daddy.

(Living Memory Mode)
- Jack, it's snowing. Won't you go to the cemetery?
- Not yet, Sorrow. I haven't written any song for my father.
- Are you going to break your promise only because of that?
- Maybe. I'm letting it go. Or i'm just postponing it for when it's not so cold.

Everytime that snow falls, if we are in town, Jackie Winter goes to the cemetery, sings a song in front of his father's grave and cries next to the tombstone. When we are touring, and he sees the first snowflakes, he goes out of the bus, plants a woodcrafted cross on the dirt and does the same.

The snow makes Jackie remember the day he had the worst fight with his father. Then he went out of the house to do some shopping. He said he would be back in 20 minutes. He returned 4 hours later, frozen and lifeless in a town patrol, escorted by a forensic doctor, a general doctor, two nurses and a cop.

Jackie was told that his father died by getting suffocated in a blizzard, that it was an accident. But his mother, that got insane after that event, told him during a visit to the sanatorium that his father got pushed into a frozen lake in the middle of a fight. The cop confirmed it to her. She never knew who did it, and she never tried to find an answer, because in the middle of that bunch of sedative pills it was not convenient to guard any grudge against any person who couldn't be able to help her out of her insanity.

Jackie has a serious psychological problem after his father's death. Though he fought with his father before seeing him for the last time, he felt guilty for what happened, and his mother tried to persuade him that it was not his fault, without success. The day of the funeral, Jackie Winter cried like never before. His father meant everything for him and he couldn't tell it while he was still alive. In front of his coffin, before being covered with dirt, he made an oath he has always accomplished:

When snow falls, i'll remember you.
Every snowfall, i'll sing a different song for you.
I'll cry in front of your grave until i run out of tears.
And i will always love you.

The oath has been maintained since 5 years ago. It's incredible the amount of songs Jackie Winter has wrote since then. I never ask him to play them with the band, because i'm not capable of desecrating those tributes. And because once the song is played at the graveyard, Jackie Winter disappears every track of it. Every song from Jackie Winter to his father is like one of those dandelion flowers, when it's touched by the wind, it fades away.

Adam Mars no Yuutsu.

(Sorrowful Fact Mode)
Reclined against one of the rims of the tour bus, Adam lights a cigarrette. He clearly remembers the day he grazed my chin with an "about to be finished" Marlboro, the little scar it left me and the million times he apologized for that stupid accident. Now, everytime Adam lights a cigarrette, he tells me: "Move away, bitch. I want to touch you with my hands, not with a cigarrette". The order was followed to satisfaction by me, but with reluctance.

I have never liked to leave Adam alone. Even less since his twin brother, Jonathan Smog, left us to study a boring career in Venezuela, fact that he had as an alibi to run away from Adam. His real reason was the jealousy between his brother and him. They were twins, though they shared everything until they were 16 years old, from now on they started to be very competitive between them: they competed to watch who was the smartest, the most talented, the most drunken one, the best ladies man, the hottest twin. It was a constant contest where there was no winner.

But one day things changed. Due to their constant competition, Adam Mars and Jonathan Smog decided that i should choose who was the winner for good. I still don't know the reasons, and i'm not interested in knowing them.

For weird twists of fate, i picked Adam. Jonathan got angry, and things between the twins got worse. When i was trying to avoid Adam and Jonathan from starting a fist-fight, i got between them, and Adam, having no other choice, threw his cigarrette aiming to Jonathan's face, but burning mine. Definitely, the fight was over since then. There was a winner already.

The day after the incident, Jonathan Smog suddenly ran away, leaving as an only track a note in which he wrote that he was tired of competing, that he admitted his defeat and he was leaving for ever. And he said the same thing Adam says: he said he loved me. I have never believed him. And i never will.

I don't regret of having chosen Adam Mars. He always has been the strongest one, the bravest one, the most determined one. I always felt more attracted to him. He was the first of the twins i met, and the one i could get along the best. Jonathan was physically identic to him, but he was an immature boy. I hope he grows up in Venezuela. I don't want him close to me. Or at least not with that childish behavior.

Everytime Adam goes out of the bus, i stay inside unless he calls me. I never rebuke him that incident, because he remembers it all the time. And his distant brother never lets him forget it. There's nothing i can do about it, except watching Adam while he smokes, through the bus' window, living with him his terrible melancholy.

Shooter Kenshiro's lost love.

(Twisted Drunk Mode)
After a round of mojitos, two rounds of Jack Daniels and five Heineken with lemon, Kenshiro stood up of the sofa in the tour bus and walked into the bathroom. Five minutes passed, and he didn't come out. No noises were coming from there, except the hard breathing crawling out of poor Shooter's corrupted lungs.

I sat and watched all the time what Kenshiro was doing, without saying a word, perfectly understanding the reasons why the tough bassist of The Great Green Yakuza used to cry after the first big round of booze. Without being seen or heard, Kenshiro regretted every night for the only thing that used to be more important than the band: His dead girlfriend Anna.

Anna was beautiful. And talented. She knew how to draw perfectly and she spoke 3 languages. She designed my outfits for the concerts. She had an enormous intelligence, that got lost partially due to her addiction to heroin.
One day, despite of Kenshiro's opposition, Anna decided to mix crack with the heroin she was injecting to herself. Big lack of intelligence in this case. The most logical thing happened, she died of a heart attack and Kenshiro blamed himself for his girlfriend's death. After lots of arguing between them, she decided to meet her maker. By herself.

The day of her funeral she looked beautiful like Snow White. She seemed like she was sleeping, so peaceful and serene that Kenshiro felt offended after all what happened the day before. Maybe that's why he blames himself for Anna's demise. He brought heroin and crack to her life and heroin and crack took her life away. He decided to stay with cocaine to release his pain somehow. That was something he wasn't able to let go for good. That event taught him a very hard and unforgettable lesson.

Every night i see the tough boy Shooter Kenshiro crying for his lost love. I am the only one who sees him, and i'm the responsible of keeping it as a secret. His image of a merciless asshole can't be stained for a memory. And it's because of it that Kenshiro cries every night, being seen by me, to avoid being seen crying by the rest of the people that don't give a fuck about his feelings, only about his fierce and flawless image of a tormented boy disguised as a cruel heartless rascal.

When Triple T met Yeyo.

(Reality Mode)
Triple T was making me sleep. It was Sunday, 11 pm. He laid next to me on Adam's bed and started petting my head. He started singing "Stricken", from Disturbed, song that lulls me until Morpheus takes possession of my body. His beautiful and sexy voice ALMOST made me fade, but he had to break the moment asking for things he shouldn't have seen.

- What do you have in your nose, Charlie?
- She's Yeyo. I must present you two.

With a samurai move, and my hand still covered in white dust, i touched his lips gently. He found my white friend so disgusting that he had to drink something that could take that flavor away. He finally didn't make me sleep that night. The roles inverted: i had to make him sleep due to the cocaine effects. He got really sick. I wasn't sorry until Jackie Winter came up with a horrible scold.

- Are you wasting your grams with T? You're losing cash if you give it to him!
- Leave me alone. It's none of your concern.
- How many times do i have to tell you that if you make him like us, we will lose ourselves and won't have any hope in the future? Who will keep us sane? Who will say "told you so"?
- Fuck you, Jack. Better give me a beer. Now!
- As you wish, bitch.

While i was drinking my Heineken, Triple T was having delusions, due to the powdered sugar i offered to him by the force. But after all, i was taking care of him the way he took care of me in other opportunities. I decided to apologize with him. I was a very bad girl, and i needed my punishment.

- T...
- What?
- Once you wake up from the high, i'll be waiting for you in the torture chamber.
- Will you be dressed in black leather, Charlie?
- Of course i will.
- I'll be there in five minutes!

The rest of that night is history. X rated history.

My Minions.

Before this wild ride goes farther, i will present my soldiers, my friends, my fucking fellas. The members of my band. The ones who can stand the lead singer's behavior.

- The Twister Theo (Triple T)
1. Real Name: James Theodore Lee.
2. Nicknames: The Twister Theo, Triple T, Trigger, Gun Powder.
3. Age: 22
4. Birthday: January 25th
5. Weight: 50 kg
6. Height: 1,70 cm
7. Instruments: Guitar, Piano, Saxophone.

The lead guitarist. The healthiest one of the band. The one who gets drunk only with smelling mints. He can decipher my hieroglyphics written on a paper to find song lyrics.
It's really impressive the way he can handle the stress, with the sanity i would like to have. He always has endorphines at MAX, because he is smiling all the time. He is always looking for me to eat healthy food, instead of drinking beer everytime i can. He also can wake me up from a high, no matter how strong it is, and he's the only one who can do it.

- Jackie Winter
1. Real Name: Jack Wyatt McCann.
2. Nicknames: Jackie Winter, Yuki, Fist of Ice, White Kappa.
3. Age: 21
4. Birthday: April 11th
5. Weight: 58 kg
6. Height: 1,75 cm
7. Instruments: Guitar, Cello.

The rythmic guitarist. The expert about bad behavior. The one that after 2 bottles of rum can stand still without feeling dizzy. He knows the right notes that i like for each song.
He goes insane when he doesn't have 100% of control in the stressful situations. According to his mood, his ups and downs are constant. He dragged me to alcoholism, and made Jack Daniels my one and only god. He doesn't sleep because he is taking care of my sleep, my drunks and my highs.

- Shooter Kenshiro
1. Real Name: Kenneth David Redfield.
2. Nicknames: Shooter Kenshiro, Kenny, Nutcracker, Crusher.
3. Age: 24
4. Birthday: October 2nd
5. Weight: 85 kg
6. Height: 1,96 cm
7. Instruments: Bass, Piano, Trumpet.

The bassist. The riot boy. The one that drinks like there's no tomorrow. He gives to the music the deepness i need with his 5-string bass. He follows my orders without refusing. His traits are always merciless and cruel, he is the heartless shithead of the band, and that attitude looks a little bit sexy on him. He's bloody, gore, rude and berserk. He is always sniffing anything, no matter what it is. He tries to pervert me all the time, and is because of him that i can't sleep sometimes.

- Adam Mars
1. Real Name: Adam Stephen Davis.
2. Nicknames: Adam Mars, Evil Twin, Gunslinger, AK-47.
3. Age: 21
4. Birthday: December 18th
5. Weight: 67 kg
6. Height: 1,83 cm
7. Instruments: Drums, Bass.

The drummer. The punk down-to-earth guy. The heavy but occasional drinker. When he plays the drums, it sounds like if he was wielding an AK-47 rifle. He knows how to stand me, how to tell me when i'm wrong or right and how to solve it. He can be kind and sharing when he wants to, as well as he can be selfish and envious when things really matter for him. He's mentally unstable, but not at my level. He's vicious, just like the way he wants. He says he loves me, and i appreciate it, but i'll never be in the mood for a relationship, unless i get tired of having fun. He knows it, and he respects it fairly.

Those are my "servants". The tough boys that can grant me any wish. The ones that make me have the naughtiest fantasies. The guys that cover me and catch me every time i fall. The men i owe everything to. The males i can't live without. Those are my guardian angels. My best friends. The members of The Great Green Yakuza.